Double Dateos

Tonight marks my first time eating out on the fast. All my research about safe eating as a gluten-free vegan points toward Asian food as one of the most reliable menu options. Thankfully, this is one of my all time favourite cultures to cook and eat. The tricky thing will be sugar.

Myself and some mates went to Nishiki in Freeman’s Bay – a very popular Japanese restaurant. The main objective tonight: help Mez and Nat get to know each other better so they can date without someone holding each of their hands. I wasn’t supposed to go but the other couple accompanying them pulled out last min. Its Henry and I to the rescue!

The boys loved giving me a hard time about my food options as I drooled over their marvellous meaty plates. The prawns nearly killed me. I love prawns more than I love Gilmore Girls (almost a sin, I know).

I definitely consumed some sugar in the glaze on my miso tofu. Somehow I feel okay with this. Eating out is hard because you’re kind of under someone else’s roof. No one wants to be that irritating diner who has no allergies yet has a list of foods they won’t eat because it makes them bloat or poop or break out or whatever. Religion is an excellent reason but I didn’t feel like it was possible to eat out anywhere without bending one rule. And anyway, tonight wasn’t about me!

It wasn’t until, like all millennials, we had a brief check-our-phones break that I realised I might be more than a chaperone on this date. Henry checked his phone and read out a text from his mate: “How’s the dateos* going?” laughter from Mez and Henry.

Nat and I immediately looked at each other. This girl is like a sister to me and we were totally reading each other’s minds at this point.

N: Holy moly he thinks this is a date

Me: Maybe it’s just his mate who thinks it is

N: Oh God, I hope so.

Me: What do I do?

N: This is my date right?

We both ignored the awkward moment and carried on with our lovely friendly dinner. When it came time to pay I wanted to split the bill but the boys insisted on paying. This may or may not be because I rolled my eyes and made a comment about a big group who split their bill about 20 ways…oops.

I felt a little bad considering I didn’t think it was a date for Henry and I but the kid had a great full time job and lives at home with his parents so without sounding like an entitled little white biddie, I think he can afford it.

*It is now totally normal for all the boys I hang out with these days to put an ‘os’ at the end of many words and names e.g. “Janeos, can I have a sipos of your drinkos”

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